No Brett, no Cutie-Cutie and Fat-Boy decides to play with some other mates so it's another - traditional - five ball that scurries of to the 6th tee. DJ manages a clean 2 ball/3 ball split (it's not that hard) that pairs himself with Tate which turns out to be an inspired move.

Regular readers of this column will be familiar with the scenario where Mr. Grumpy shoots something in the high thirties, but loses the match and £4, collects the camels and a couple of OOBs and cops for a handicap cut.

Tate offers a new slant on this. He shoots only 18 points including 8 blobs and 5 OOBs, but somehow knits together with DJ such that they win both nines, the match and collect so much cash off Mr. Grumpy, Turbo and Nance that he finishes up fiscally advantaged. Not only that but he gets a plus 2.2 to his handicap which now stands at 26.

All thoughts of retirement should be shelved immediately.

Elsewhere Fat-Boy in the company of Andy Brooks gets stuffed, which will have cost him money.

One wonders whether the first Sunday of September will result in a Muffin full house - or will Summer 4 Balls intervene. On other matters an audit of the cash in Mr. Grumpy's safe reveals a mere £4 deficit against the computer prediction which is slightly better than the Chancellor of the Exchequer's position.