Nance and Fat-Boy have a Summer 4 Ball so it's just the 6 Muffins. There's an early crisis when it's realised that both the Chief and Deputy Tosser's are absent. Mr. Grumpy is reluctantly thrust into the limelight and in a performance reminiscent of an England goalkeeper, begins by dropping balls onto the path and then conducting the 1st toss with only 5 balls.

Having conquered his nerves he picks Cutie-Cutie and Brett as his partners, leaving the Villa Boys to debate the enigma that is Emile Heskey for the next 4 hours. In the event their status on the 1st tee is gazumped by the aforesaid Summer 4 Ball and they have to slope off to the 3rd.

They say that two things in life are unavoidable - death and taxes. For Brett, add the stream in front of the 2nd green. However, the water level is low and despite the ball lying behind a large rock, Brett de-ducks to 4 feet.

In another break with tradition, Brett's clubs are actually clean, the result of discovering a decomposed banana in the bottom of his bag which made the grips rather tackier than necessary.

Cutie-Cutie is on the top of his backswing on the 4th tee when Fat-Boy's ball scurries through his legs with the result that no one knows where his tee shot has gone. Fortunately it's discovered in the left hand rough.

At the half way point is clear that Brett, Cutie-Cutie and Mr. Grumpy are onto a winner and the main topic of conversation is by how much will Mr. Grumpy's back 9 descend into the usual farce. The answer is "not much" and he holds his nerve and temper to register his first ten-pointer of the Summer and, uniquely, no fines.