It's the Sunday of the London Marathon and the Muffins reason that there's little point in trying to cover 26 miles 385 yards in 3.5 hours when just 4 miles will suffice. Also the marathon feeding stations inexplicably don't do egg and bacon rolls, so they eschew Chris Brasher's invitation, but Nance overloads on pasta and plays like a pantomime horse just to get into the right spirit anyway.

It's also the US Masters and the Warwickshire County trials, but owing to an administrative oversight, there are no Muffin representatives in those events either. They are obviously the poorer for it.

Fat-Boy has allowed 6 Muffins to participate and in the toss-up, he sends out DJ, Tate and Mr. Grumpy, to be followed by Brett, Nance and himself. Conditions are soft and moist - just the way Fat-Boy likes it, allegedly.

The front 9 initially appears a clear win for the latter trio, 40 points to 37, until Mr. Grumpy has some practice in adding two numbers together on the patio, at which point the gap narrows to just one.

The back 9 is a runaway victory for the lead trio, 42 points to 35 and the match is thus won by 6. Those residents of Links Drive engaging in a bit of Spring planting have their concentration disturbed by Tate, who bashes one out of bounds and then rebukes himself loudly in a robust Anglo Saxon fashion.

Mr. Grumpy's concentration is also tested around Amen Corner by DJ's graphic description of the 'helmet cam' employed on a Channel 5 TV programme. Suggestions that the Fat-Boy be examined for velcro and staple marks are not followed up.

Fat-Boy and Tate share 15 camels and 3 OOBs and DJ is awarded a duck despite not going in the water. Mr. Grumpy sneaks 10 points.

Next week is a 'Cutie-Cutie week', possibly, maybe. Watch this space......