Several unexplained absences and a rumoured retirement mean another poor turn out for Week 2.

Mr. Grumpy resumes a hitherto productive partnership with Nance, and Turbo teams up with Cutie-Cutie. A bit of a log jam on the course occasioned by the new Lady Captain's driving-in and lunch dictates a start from the third tee and by the sandwiches, Nance and Mr. Grumpy appear to have an unassailable lead. 

Appearances can be deceptive apparently.

On the back nine Turbo turns up the wick and a couple of four-pointers backed up by a few three-pointers start to turn the tide. It's all square going down the 2nd and last hole, and Turbo's 5 nett 3 is sufficient to piss on the chips, added to which Mr. Grumpy collects the camels. It's all a bit unsatisfactory from your correspondent's point of view, but excessive use of both the putter and sand-wedge are the root of the problem.

Anyway, as a result of his performance and his position at the top of the leaderboard, Turbo has now had his handicap slashed to only 29. 

It may be a long, hard winter.

In the bar Jimmy Crankie takes £5 off Mr. Grumpy and in return gives him six attempts to predict where the new Lady Captain will put her drive. She's using the yellow tees apparently. Now, Mr. Grumpy used to play off 14 and the yellow tees, so he puts his lollipop sticks just shy of where his ball used to land - favouring the right rough obviously.

The new Lady Captain then sticks her drive straight up the middle and 40 yards further, thus concluding a rather disappointing morning all round.